This month marks the tenth anniversary I moved to Crappy Colorado. Today also happens to mark the 2-month anniversary to the day of which I moved back to my home state, the Golden State. Crazy to thinks its been two months already. Honestly, I'm brimming with joy. I can't recall a time in my life I've been happier for this long of time.
Like everything in life, California may not be perfect; plenty of cynical people attack it, primarily due to the current economy. Unlike others, I prefer not to dwell on slight imperfections(if you prefer to read nasty cynicism run amok of my state just read the comments for "Breitbart California"). In order to celebrate my joyous return here are my "Top 10 Things I've Missed About California" list, in no real order:
1. The Weather: You knew this one was coming. Might as well get it out of the way.
Gone are problems like having to rush to the community pool as a rainstorm may come by noon and it'll close…on a freaking summer day! Not to say it never rains(it actually is drizzling right now which is good for the drought) but that is nothing compared to the endless thunderstorms/hailstorms/rainstorms one has to endure in states like CO. Majority of the time the sun is out with glorious wonderful heat! Some places like Malibu having perfect weather all the time averaging in the 70s. I actually will have a spring again, even a fall. Don't get me started when it comes to winter. I can't wait for another winter with no snow or ice of any kind, not even frost. If I just keep remembering those days from CO during the winter I may not even need a jacket.
2. Beaches: Speaking of Malibu and good weather, its hard to imagine good weather without a beach. One of CA's more obvious natural landscapes, you'll find many beach communities which, while expensive to live, a daily visit is well worth a trip. Most of the beaches offer as beautiful of a sight as any place on earth you're ever going to encounter. Plus, there's a million of activities to indulge in. There's swimming, surfing, boogieboarding, sand-castle building, sand-crab digging, shel0lsearching, volleyball, jogging, flying a kite, tanning, eating, watching the sunrise….I could just go on and on. Its fun to even just do nothing at the beach. Every trip to the beach is literally a new adventure that's unique. People who mention the joys of "mountains" always perplex me as I always wonder what the hell can you do with a mountain? Climb it?
3. Palms Trees: Palm trees are always fun to look at and admire, if you're lucky you might be able to catch a falling palm. Pine trees by comparison are ugly. A complete eye sore that's only worse if you get near some of them as they can easily give you rashes!
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Speaking of palm trees...
4. In-N-Out Burger: Most delicious fast food ever? Double-doubles, fries you can salt yourself, neapolitan shakes. Plus, they're practically the only fast-food joint you can order "7-Up" instead of Sprite. Plus, service is always nice, plus the interiors are as sparkly as can be, plus….
5. El Pollo Loco's Pinto Beans: This one is somewhat personal, but these are seriously the best pinto beans on the planet. I grew up with these things. The chicken is also quite tasty(fun clipnote: I always assumed the writers of Breaking Bad based "Los Pollos Hermanos" in part on El Pollo Loco), but its really the pinto beans that are the real draw!
Someone else making this list could easily put "Mexican food" as an entry as CA is the best place to get mexican food as there are a few places in Los Angeles are elsewhere in CA that are more mexican than Mexico itself! But seriously, those pinto beans! As someone who has ordered a side of pinto beans at every restaurant chain that serves mexican food, I can assure you they're the best and nothing comes close.
6. Donut Shops: One of the first sundays I experienced in CO, after going to church I went searching for a donut store in an attempt to recreate my old church in Encino which served donuts at the end every mass. Much to my horror, there were no donut shops. At all. No bakeries of any sort for that matter. It helped explained why the cops in that area where total douche-bags, but I still was stunned that a place could have no donut shops. The closest thing to gaining a donut was going to a supermarket. It was that moment, along with the fact Alzheimer's disease exists, that converted me to atheism. By contrast. CA has every donut place a person can dream of. From big name brands like "Winchell's" and "Krispy Kremes" to family-owned stores. Then there are some local chains like "Randy's Donuts" that are so iconic that their stores make great money-shots for movies like Iron Man 2!
7.
Museums: Like a good museum? CA has got you covered. The J. Paul Getty Museum, a 2-part extravaganza of a building in the mountains that has as massive of an art collection as you can ask for, with painting dating back to ancient Greece, Rome and Etruria. There's also a ton of museums through-out the state ranging on subjects from cars, trains, Hollywood, presidents, surfing...it's all there. Thanks to the movies even mundane things in CA are special as if you're a movie buff, pretty much everything is a former movie-set. One second, you may find yourself driving at the highway they shot
It's a Mad Mad Mad Mad World, then then next thing you'll find yourself at the shopping mall where Marty traveled to 1955 in
Back to the Future. Even places like the Verizon stores have display cases for all the past models of phones they used in the past which make for a fun mini-museum! California itself has an
entire museum dedicated the many accomplished individuals and life-altering events that have happened in this state. By comparison, Colorado's idea for a "
museum" was teaching people that a while back inhabitants of the state use typewriters. Uh….cool???????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
8. Architechual Design: Yeah, CA is the home state of Frank Gehry, designer most famous for our beloved Walt Disney Concert Hall. But even if you're someone who likes to drive by everyday people's house and admire exteriors, CA is the place for you. What other state offers this much variety? One second you can be in front of a four-story mansion nobody can afford, and right next to it is a run-down shack. Every house offers a different design, color, shape and feel. In my neighborhood, the suburbs were blander than bland, with everybody's house designed by the exact same molder, looking exactly the same as the house next to it which a cruel and mean home owner's association that scribbly enforced rules to make your house look like they want it to look.
9. Gardeners: Who says immigration is all bad? It means a ton of gardeners! Have a little grass in your area that's getting a bit tall? Gardeners will take care of it. Have a yard that consistently needs taking care of? You don't have to do it yourself or overpay one of your neighborhood's greedy teenagers. You have a GARDENER! One of my most painful memories from CO was helping my parents drag humungous piles of mulch from the front of the house to the backyard. No matter what experience I have in CA, its doubtful I'll ever have one and as painful and traumatizing as that one.
And finally….
10. Living in A Place Where The Most Fun Tourist Attraction Isn't A Pile of Rocks: So far, I've yet to experience a CA attraction that matches Garden of The Gods for lameness. The only setback to that, of course, is that if I ever get around to it, I should start to change the name of this blog nobody reads.
